Massive Bangs

Observe: At this time’s submit incorporates a phrase that begins with “p” and rhymes with “Venus.” Mother and father, please mother or father accordingly.

Earlier than you head out to top off on fireworks right this moment, this is a useful tip from the parents over at Lamebook:

Maybe I ought to rephrase that.

(Additionally: ow.)

What I meant was, in terms of fireworks, you really need probably the most bang to your buck:

So all the time search for the cartoon steam whistle shouting, “Bang!”

You must also familiarize your self with what fireworks really look like, so you do not find yourself with a bunch of…bombs. (See what I did there?)

Even when they are patriotically

potent

highly effective

penis-ish ones.

No, belief me, you do not need sprinkles.

I see…slushies.

Oh my gosh! They killed Blinky!

(That is the purple ghost from Pac-Man, children. Now cease making me really feel outdated.)

Necessary rocket security tip:

The flamey bits ought to all the time come out the again.

Additionally, remember your patriotic donut holes!

A minimum of they remembered the blue balls this time.

Due to Jessica G., Daybreak S., Gail D., Deanna T., Amber S., Leanne O., & Saralyn T., who make ’em go “Oh, oh, oh” whereas they shoot throughout the sky-y-y.

In a firework-y means, I imply.

Not a penis-ishy means.

NEW GOAL: Work the phrase “penis-ishy” into as many dialog right this moment as doable. Beginning…NOW.

*****

P.S. Whereas we’re flirting with that PG-13 score we could as properly discuss bewbs, proper? So this is a shout-out to my favourite wire-free bra:

Warner’s Easy Does It Seamless Wireless Bra

 I like the under-arm smoothing panel – no dig or pinch! – and like most Warners, these are extremely comfy. These are all I put on now! I watch the itemizing and purchase any colour that goes underneath $20, so you’ll want to test all of them in your dimension. (I am a 34DDD and put on a Massive, if that helps.)

 Oh, and you’ll want to test the picture gallery for a greater concept of how these look on bigger tracts of land.